The Following "Sea Story" was sent to me awhile back. I have edited it some. See how much of the story you can
follow before you scroll down to the "Glossary of Terms."
Me and Willy were lollygagging by the scuttlebutt after being aloft to boy butter up the antennas and were
just perched on a bollard eyeballing a couple of bilge rats and flangeheads using crescent hammers to pack monkey
shit around a fitting on a handybilly. All of a sudden the dicksmith started hard-assing one of the deck apes for lifting
his pogey bait. The pecker-checker was a sewer pipe sailor and the deckape was a gator. Maybe being blackshoes on a bird
farm surrounded by a gaggle of cans didn't set right with either of those gobs. The deck ape ran through the nearest
hatch and dogged it tight because he knew the penis machinist was going to lay below, catch him between decks and punch
him in the snot locker. He'd probably wind up on the binnacle list but Doc would find a way to gundeck the paper or give
it the deep six to keep himself above board. We heard the skivvywaver announce over the bitch box that the breadburners
had creamed foreskins on toast (SOS) ready on the mess decks so we cut and run to avoid the fustercluck when
the twidgets and cannon cockers knew chow was on. We were balls to the wall for the barn and everyone was preparing to
hit the beach as soon as we doubled-up and threw over the brow. I had a ditty bag full of fufu juice that I was gonna spread
on thick for the bar hogs with those sweet bosnias. Sure beats the hell out of brown bagging. Might even hit the
acey-duecy club and try to hook up with a westpac widow. They were always leaving snail trails on the dance floor
on amateur night.
Now, For you Land Lubbers OR those of you who may have forgotten . . .
GLOSSARY OF TERMS
lollygagging-----goofing off scuttlebutt-----drinking fountain aloft-----in the superstructure boy butter-----light
tan grease or silicone - for antennas and masts bollard-----attached to a pier or deck to secure mooring
lines. bilge rats-----Engineering ratings flangeheads-----Enginemen crescent hammers-----Cresent wrenches handybilly-----P500
submersible pump dicksmith-----Hospital Corpsman hard-assing-----Giving someone a hard time verbally deck ape-----Personnel
assigned to the deck gang, usually Boatswain Mates pogey bait-----any sweet stuff like candy, etc....(bought in the ge-dunk) ge-dunk-----Place
to buy pogey bait sewer pipe-----Submarine gator-----Ships of the amphibious force blackshoes-----Non-aviation ratings bird
farm-----Aircraft Carrier cans-----Destroyers gobs-----sailors hatch-----doors, entrances through a bulkhead (wall) dogged
it-----activate a handle that puts the locks into place penis machinist-----Hospital Corpsman lay below-----to go to
a lower level of the ship...below the weather decks snot locker-----nose binnacle list-----Medical department list of
personnel in a no/light duty status Gundeck-----to falsify a record deep six-----to throw overboard skivvywavers-----Signalmen breadburners-----cooks
[or stewburners or gut-robbers]
fustercluck /cluster&%# -----self-explanatory [Chinese fire drill, to those less PC] twidgets-----men
who work in electronics fields cannon cockers-----Gunnersmates balls to the wall-----full speed ahead barn-----home
port hit the beach-----go on liberty doubled up-----moored securely to the pier brow-----walkway from ship/shore/ship ditty
bag-----small canvas bag issued to sailors to keep incidentals in fufu juice-----cologne bar hogs-----young/old ladies
who frequent sailor bars bosnias-----Big Old Standard Navy Issue Asses brown bagging-----refers to married sailors who
live off the ship while in port and bring lunch in a brown bag. acey-duecy club-----Club for E5s and E6s (PO1 &
PO2) westpac widow-----women whose husbands are at sea amateur night-----payday night
Reflections of a Blackshoe by Vice Admiral Harold Koenig, USN (Ret)
I
like the Navy.
I like standing on the bridge wing at sunrise with salt spray in my face and clean ocean winds whipping
in from the four quarters of the globe the ship beneath me feeling like a living thing as her engines drive her through
the sea. I like the sounds of the Navy - the piercing trill of the boatswains pipe, the syncopated clangor of the ship's
bell on the quarterdeck, the harsh squawk of the 1MC and the strong language and laughter of sailors at work.
I like
the vessels of the Navy - nervous darting destroyers, plodding fleet auxiliaries, sleek submarines and steady solid carriers.
I like the proud sonorous names of Navy capital ships: Midway, Lexington, Saratoga, Coral Sea - memorials of great battles
won. I like the lean angular names of Navy 'tin-cans': Barney, Dahlgren, Mullinix, McCloy - mementos of heroes who went before
us.
I like the tempo of a Navy band blaring through the topside speakers as we pull away from the oiler after refueling
at sea. I like liberty call and the spicy scent of a foreign port. I even like all hands working parties as my ship fills
herself with the multitude of supplies both mundane and exotic which she needs to cut her ties to the land and carry out her
mission anywhere on the globe where there is water to float her.
I like sailors, men from all parts of the land, farms of the Midwest,
small towns of New England, from the cities, the mountains and the prairies, from all walks of life. I trust and depend on
them as they trust and depend on me - for professional competence, for comradeship, for courage. In a word, they are "shipmates."
I like the surge of adventure in my heart when the word is passed "Now station the special sea and anchor detail -
all hands to quarters for leaving port", and I like the infectious thrill of sighting home again, with the waving hands of
welcome from family and friends waiting pierside.
The work is hard and dangerous, the going rough at times, the parting
from loved ones painful, but the companionship of robust Navy laughter, the 'all for one and one for all' philosophy of the
sea is ever present.
I like the serenity of the sea after a day of hard ship's work, as flying fish flit across the
wave tops and sunset gives way to night. I like the feel of the Navy in darkness - the masthead lights, the red and green
navigation lights and stern light, the pulsating phosphorescence of radar repeaters - they cut through the dusk and join with
the mirror of stars overhead. And I like drifting off to sleep lulled by the myriad noises large and small that tell me that
my ship is alive and well, and that my shipmates on watch will keep me safe.
I like quiet midwatches with the aroma
of strong coffee - the lifeblood of the Navy - permeating everywhere. And I like hectic watches when the exacting minuet of
haze-gray shapes racing at flank speed keeps all hands on a razor edge of alertness.
I like the sudden electricity
of "General Quarters, General Quarters, all hands man your battle stations", followed by the hurried clamor of running feet
on ladders and the resounding thump of watertight doors as the ship transforms herself in a few brief seconds from a peaceful
workplace to a weapon of war - ready for anything. And I like the sight of space-age equipment manned by youngsters clad in
dungarees and sound-powered phones that their grandfathers would still recognize.
I like the traditions of the Navy
and the men and women who made them. I like the proud names of Navy heroes: Halsey, Nimitz, Perry, Farragut, John Paul Jones.
A sailor can find much in the Navy: comrades-in-arms, pride in self and country, mastery of the seaman's trade. An adolescent
can find adulthood.
In years to come, when sailors are home from the sea, they will still remember with fondness and
respect the ocean in all its moods - the impossible shimmering mirror calm and the storm-tossed green water surging over the
bow. And then there will come again a faint whiff of stack gas, a faint echo of engine and rudder orders, a vision of the
bright bunting of signal flags snapping at the yardarm, a refrain of hearty laughter in the wardroom and chief's quarters
and messdecks. Gone ashore for good they will grow wistful about their Navy days, when the seas belonged to them and a new
port of call was ever over the horizon.
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